For Zoey Siciliano, rugby is everything. It helped her to not only build strength but also to cope with anxiety. Besides her studies at Seneca College in Toronto, Zoe is part of the ‘Seneca Stings’ rugby team. Playing with a goal to get to nationals, she faces severe anxiety caused by stress from school and personal relationships. Zoe Siciliano shared what it is like to deal with mental health issues through a challenging sport like rugby.
How did you get your start playing rugby?
‘I started playing rugby in high school in grade 10. I was playing soccer and I was too aggressive for soccer, so I ended up quitting the soccer team and started playing rugby. It was definitely my game. It felt right to play and I was already athletic before, so playing rugby was natural to me.’
You said it felt right. What felt right?
‘It felt right just being on the field, just playing. It just felt like the sport I was destined to play. I wanted to be an Olympian. I wanted to be a track star. I wanted to play soccer professionally, basketball professionally as well, but playing rugby and being on the field just felt like the sport I was always meant to play.’
How is your situation with mental health?
‘This semester alone I’ve had two mental breakdowns already and it’s definitely been a struggle to go to class, get up in the morning. Sometimes, even just to go to practices, it’s been a struggle. When I was trying out for Team Canada, I didn’t end up making it and that came as well to my mental health struggles. I didn’t think I was good enough.’
What are some of the struggles playing rugby helped you overcome?
‘Well, recently, I broke up with my boyfriend. That’s definitely been a big struggle. This year for this season at Seneca, I really told myself, “Put everything you’ve got. Just don’t think about anything like that. Just put everything into this season. Play well and try to come up with gold metal.” And that’s exactly what I did. Unfortunately, we didn’t win gold. We won bronze, but still, we won a medal and was still a good experience. ‘
Does it offer you some kind of distraction?
‘Being on the field it takes everything away. When I’m on the field I’m a different person, and I’m like not here, and it’s not reality, and it’s better sometimes to be that way. I like that rugby is my outlet for that.’